The Tour Championship

V for Victory

Date Written: September 29, 2008

From the PGA Tour website yesterday:
"In a four-man race coming to the final holes, Camillo Villegas caught Sergio Garcia with a 7-iron from 184 yards to 12 feet on the 17th, then twice hit beautiful lag putts from 45 feet for par on the 233-yard 18th -- once in regulation to finish at 7-under 273, then in the playoff to win The Tour Championship."

The two V's (Vijay & Villegas) prospered mightily through the Fed-Ex season which is now, thank God (with a big G), over. Each of the V's win a ton of extra dough because "you-know-who" was on the mend at home. Seven under was good enough to playoff this year on the re-designed East Lake track. "You-Know-Who" was twenty three under last year to win the whole shebang. I think the V's should send Tiger 10% of their winnings for not being able to show up and allowing them to cash in.

If you want to read more about Tiger's absence and dwindling TV ratings and "tweaking" the Fed-Ex format, click on Thomas Bonk's article today in the LA Times:

http://www.latimes.com/sports/la-spw-golf30-2008sep30,0,1979671.story

With the conclusion of The Tour Championship, we have finished our fantasy pool season. Our three winners will find a chunk of dough in their mailboxes in a couple of days. Lord Arthur of Poppy killed us with his stellar, year-long picks. For his efforts, Lord Arthur takes home roughly 60% of the overall pool money ($2,500.00) for a total of $1,475.00. Second place goes to late charging Perry Sato ($725.00) and third place money to the Boise Flash....Pat Moloney ($300.00). Nice going you guys.

I hope you all enjoyed this past season and my sometimes caustic weekly commentary. It's never too early to start thinking on your picks for next year, at the very least, asking yourselves why you had a bunch of "No-Shows." We should also collectively consider the most controversial element of the pool...awarding double money for the Majors. Tell me via email if you like or dislike that feature and we will act accordingly. First tournament of 2009 will be the Mercedes at Kapalua in early January. Remember, in order to make the field in that first event, your player has to have won a tournament during 2008. I haven't found the official 2009 schedule online yet. There shouldn't be many venue changes (other than the U.S., British and PGA Championships) but the dates will surely be different.

Happy Footballing,

The Deutsche Bank

Vijay 2, Field 0

Date Written: September 2, 2008

Vijay doesn't show much emotion when he's tending to his profession so despite the business-like image to the left, I did actually spot him smiling a couple of times this weekend as he was rolling in long putt after long putt while winning his second straight Schmed-Ex event.

From the PGA Tour website:

"I got on the green and just kept talking to my caddie, 'I'm the best putter in the world,' and he said, 'You're damn right you are, now go ahead and knock it in,' and I made it. That's just a good attitude. Instead of standing there and hoping you're going to get up and down in two, I was trying to make those putts. My unconscious mind had a lot of stored-up bad thoughts in there, and that was the key, to get rid of all that, and I think I've done that,' Singh said."

After Vijay's success with convincing himself that "putting is just attitude," I'm going to do some of the same...tell myself that I'm the best putter in the world. I'll give you a report on how this works after I play in the Idaho State Seniors tournament next week. I'll see if I can fool myself into this major disbelief. Those little putting devils that live in my head are probably laughing their asses off as I write this.

Vijay's made the Schmed-Ex a "done deal" for this year. Short of a miracle, no one can catch him and deny him the 10 million smackers . When the sponsorship renewal hits the negotiating table next year, the PGA and Fed-Ex oughta discuss dumping the whole cockamamie deal. They should come to their senses and realize that their attempt at changing TV viewing habits are too tough to break. There's a reason we like football folks. Beside being a terrific game; it's fall, it's life. You cannot "undo" the magic of the changing seasons.

No one had Vijay this week in our funky pool. Lord Arthur, he of magical picking powers, remains secluded in his lofty, 1.6 million dollar lead with just two events left on our schedule. A question for his Lordship: after you receive the proceeds of first place money, are you going to pay down your credit card debt or are you going to make a dent on your outstanding bar tab? Or, like a good Irishman, give it away to the orphan golfers of County Kerrick?

The Barclays

The First Leg of the Schmed-Ex

Date Written: August 25, 2008
Jason Sobel of espn.com sums up the first week of the Schmed-Ex:

"Up is down. Left is right. In is out. Sergio Garcia and Vijay Singh each made clutch putts under pressure on the first extra hole at The Barclays on Sunday. Welcome to PGA Tour Bizarro World, where the game's most maligned putters each proved their mettle with the flat stick at crunch time during the first FedEx Cup payoffs event.

We're still unsure as to whether these two top talents are consistently inconsistent or inconsistently consistent, but it might be a little of both. Singh's victory on the second playoff hole gave him two wins in the past four weeks -- his first two titles of the season -- sandwiching them around a pair of missed cuts at the PGA and Wyndham. Meanwhile, Garcia continues to pile up runner-up results like Michael Phelps collects gold medals, but he's got to be pleased at ranking first in the field in putting average and second in total putts per round at Ridgewood Country Club."

Couldn't have said it better, Jason. Eleven guys ended up within 2 shots of making the playoff. Pretty good theatre as I fast-forwarded between the thousands of Cialis and Village's commercials to actually see a golf shot.

Congrats to two of our fellow bottom-dwellers, T & A and Doc 'N Jill, for climbing up the standings in our funky pool with their winning pick of V.J. at the Barclay's. Nice goin' kids!

Danny Lee, pictured above. Get used to seeing his face. The young phenom from New Zealand, became the youngest player ever (just over 18 years of age) to win the USGA Amateur Championship which was played at Pinehurst this past week. In the 36- hole final against Drew Kittleson who plays at Florida State, Lee was 11-under for 32 total holes until he won easily, 5 & 4. One of the perks for winning will be to be paired next year at The U.S. Open with one Mr. Tiger Woods. Can you imagine the introduction: "Mr. Woods, shake hands with Mr. Lee, the umpteenth youngster who might succeed you."

To read more about Lee click on the link below:

http://www.usamateur.org/news/sun_lee_final.html

Onward to the second leg of the Schmed-Ex...The Deutsche Bank. Do you think the Germans (along with the Scots, the Chinese, the Saudi's, etc.) want to manage our money? Eight of us (including me, figured that Brett Wetterich would play back to his Deutsche finish of last year. Lo and behold, according to Rotoworld.com, Brett doesn't make the Schmed-Ex field because....

"Brett Wetterich is suffering from tendinitis in his right wrist and has been treating it under doctor's care," his agent, Terry Reilly, said in an email. Wetterich injured his wrist on June 10 while practicing at Torrey Pines and has withdrawn early from all five events since. "We are unsure as to his return," Reilly added. Wetterich did not qualify for the British Open and has committed to next week's concurrent U.S. Bank Championship but that start is in doubt. He's halfway to a minor medical extension (two-month minimum layoff) and will need to make a decision soon if he's going to sit the full four months to qualify for a major medical. That would shelve him through October 1. It's quite possible that the wrist injury will also force a decision to have his shoulder repaired."

Sounds to me like Brett's body parts are going out of warranty. He won over $2 mil in '07 and tied for second at last year's Deutsche. Brett's swing speed has always appeared to me to be way too hard and too fast. A bit of elderly advice to...bring it down a notch pal. When you get older (the only thing I can absolutely guarantee), you'll want to be able to enjoy the game and a cocktail without being in pain.

Wyndham Championship

The Tar Heel State

Date Written: August 18, 2008


One of the biggest intra-state rivalries in collegiate sports takes place within the "Tar Heel State." In Carolina, your blood runs either baby blue or red hot...UNC or NC State. I know what a Wolfpack is (NC State) but I've always wanted to know, what's a "Tar Heel" Do you know? And who's the most famous "Tar Heel Golfer?" I'll provide the answer at the end of this weeks missive. In any event, the Wolfpack prevailed this past weekend at the Wyndham, aka The Greater Greensboro Classic.

If there was ever a case to be made for the gambling theory of, "horses for courses," the Wyndham was it. Swedish-born but locally-raised, Carl Pettersson, who's probably played the course a gazillion times and also played at N.C. State, smoked the field. Transplanted Tim Clark from So. Africa, who also attended N.C. State, finished T-6.

The remarkable news is that seven of our pool players picked Pettersson to win. Not since the U.S. Open at Torrey Pines, where twelve of us picked Tiger in his historic, one-legged win, and the Sony in Hawaii where eight pool players picked K.J. Choi, have we seen as many "winners" in one week. The bad news is that our esteemed pool leader, Lord Arthur of Kerrick was one of the seven Pettersson-pickers. Lord Arthur pads his lead to nearly $1.6 Mil over his next closest competitor, his pal, Perry Sato. Master Sato also had Petterssson to add to his extraordinary late run and has now leapt into second place. Lord Arthur and his trusty crystal ball have now picked four outright winners this season. Go direct to Vegas, Art...don't fool around with the peanuts you are going to win in our funky pool. My horse Mayfair was last seen limping into the barn in last place, apparently all tuckered out from putting on the Donald Ross track. Wavy putting strokes do not work on undulating greens.

Another N.C. transplant, Brandon de Jonge, who was bornded in Zimbabwe, but now calls Charlotte home, won the Nationwide event in Rochester, NY. Which brings me to hokey song:

"Nothing Could be Finer
Than the Golf in Caroliner
...in Au-August?"

Onward to the first leg of the SCHMED-EX Cup, starting at the Barclays at a storied venue, Ridgewood C.C., across the river in Paramus, NJ. I blatantly make fun of the "Schmed-Ex" format because, in a word...it's sooo STUPID! Most of you know from my comments last year that I hate the contrived points system. It smacks too much of NASCAR commercialism. Aren't there enough commercials between shots on TV? I once counted two putts and then five commercials. And what about the phony, re-set point system? Would someone write and explain that concept to this witless reporter? If you're having trouble too and don't understand, let's start a letter-writing campaign to our Congressmen! At the very least, do as I do, set your TIVO to fast-forward through the Schmed-Ex commercials. Even though they are funny, they do not deserve our patronage. Ship UPS or DHL.

Finally, from our very own, "Diamond Jim Brady" comes an interesting LA Times article linking sex with good health: Dah!

http://www.latimes.com/features/health/la-he-mating18-2008aug18,0,4651977.story

I would have added that five rounds of golf a week is good for the "unit" too!

In answer to the question posed in the first paragraph, what is a "Tar Heel" click on the "Ask Yahoo" link below. And, the most famous Tar Heel Golfer...Davis Love, of course, who also has a second home here in Sun Valley. Maybe Davis will join our pool next year and try his hand at de-throning Lord Arthur?

http://ask.yahoo.com/20040316.html

The PGA

Hear Ye, Hear Ye!

Date Written: August 11, 2008

"Hear Ye, Hear Ye!" All those who thought Padraig of Harrington was not for real, raise your hand? Paddy has a new mission: he has to hire a finished carpenter to build more cabinetry in his den. Where else to place his new PGA Wanamaker trophy to rest aside his back-to-back Claret Jugs.

Some commentator, somewhere, suggested that there be an asterisk (*) by the name of any major winner if Tiger was not in the field. I don't think so. Winning three majors in a little over one year certainly qualifies Paddy to stand alone as Tiger's "prime contender." Step aside Lefty, Veej, Jimmy Furyk, and any other "wanna-be." Paddy's matching 4-under-par 66's over the final two rounds on the Oakland Hills monster removes any doubt that he's the world's second best player. There's even speculation amongst the media of the possibility of "The Paddy-Slam." The next leg being the '09 Masters. Tiger's return to Major competition and Paddy's emergence will surely be the story next April. Paddy can obviously can handle pressure. His putting down the stretch yesterday at Oakland Hills was the stuff of dreams. The following his from his own lips:

"I know I love the idea of the back nine of a major on a Sunday. I love it so much that I'm actually disappointed I'm seven months away from the next major, and I don't know what I'm going to do. I've really focused hard on the majors the last two years. My whole schedule is built around majors. And definitely I've turned up at other events, and unless I get into contention, you know, sometimes it feels like a race, like a sprint, whereas a major feels like a marathon. I feel like I can be patient and take my time. And I love the feeling of knowing that it's going to come down to the back nine; it's going to come down to who can do it under pressure in the last nine holes."

Our very own black Irishman, Lord Arthur of Kerrick, was sweating bullets over the weekend because his horse, Vijay, was last seen stumbling at the halfway mark. On his way to 5-putting one green and failing to make the cut, The Veej was last seen muttering to himself as he slammed his left-hand-low, belly putter into the trunk of his expensive rental car. You can breathe now Lord Arthur, your lead is still intact. Now that "double-payoff" Majors are out of the way, your chances down the stretch appear fairly solid to garner substantial, first place pool money.

Booby Prize poem:

Doc 'N Jill
Ran up a hill
trying to avoid disaster

When they came down
Their Sergio did frown
to have to kiss Paddy's aster...again.

Doc N' Jill make enough "double-money" on Sergio to climb out of the Pool basement, leaving Matt Kendrick alone, looking up. Perry Sato also had Sergio and makes a giant leap from 10th to 4th. That is huge at this late stage of the game!

Speaking of Booby Prizes, anyone remember the Cropper Bros. from years past? They decided to sit out this year, restore their collective egos and try to figure out a better approach to picking guys who will just show-up for a tournament, let alone make the cut. I miss the Cropper's and their wild-ass, off-the-wall picks. Remember the famous cowboy movie in the 50's, "Shane?" The famous line at the end was, "Come back, Shane!" I'm gonna change it to, "Come back, Croppers," if only for the laughs.


And finally, a forwarding laugh from John Manocheo entitled:

When your ball ends up in the 3" rough, here's the club for you!
http://www.bigdaddydriver.com/see-the-video.aspx

WGC/Bridgestone

Putt Like a Dog

Date Written: August 4, 2008


The Associated Press summarized this past week's "Tiger-less" WGC/Bridgestone event as follows:

"With par putts on the final two holes, Singh closed with a 2-under 68 to hold off hard-charging Lee Westwood and Stuart Appleby and the fast-fading Phil Mickelson, who lost a one-shot lead with three bogeys on his final four holes."

The quote above really doesn't tell the full story. Despite Veej making two 4-footers at the end, his putting stroke looked, over the last nine holes, to be as scary as "Sweeney Todd." He missed enough short putts from 4-8 feet to land him a free pass to the seventh floor at Bellevue. If it weren't for his playing partner, "Lefty- Mick," falling all over himself coming in, he loses. Lefty played bogey-free for 14 holes and had a one-shot lead until making bogey from the bunker on three of the last four holes. So much for Lefty's famous, flawless short game.

Veej's 'wavy-gravy' putting stroke reminded me of me. As a kid, I used to make everything. Now if I make a putt, it's headline news. To me, forget reading greens; the hole looks to be the size of a thimble. My young (soon to turn forty) playing partner, Mikey P. says the hole looks as big as a trash can. I wonder if he's just delusional or trying to psyche me out. Veej and I can barely bring it back and through straight on three-footers let alone middle-of-the-green efforts. Veej claimed in a pre-game interview Sunday, that he's gonna stick with his belly putter. I have two belly putters...both have been banished permanently to a very dark closest as punishment for their bad behavior. Belly or no belly, cross-handed or upside-down, whatever Veej needs to be reminded that it's the Indian, not the arrows. He might consider therapy. We both putt like dogs!

Lefty's endgame meltdown caused our Mikey P. to lose a golden chance at winning for the week. Our esteemed pool leader, Master Arthur, padded his lead to over one million smackers with his lucky pick of "The Goose" who tied Lefty for fourth place.

This week, the PGA Championship outside Detroit, is the last Major tournament that will count for double pool money. Someone needs to make a dent in Master Art's million dollar lead. My prediction...Singh's wavy-gravy putting stroke won't work here on greens rolled to 13 on the Stimp. Thankfully, Master Art picked "The Veej" this week. Hah! He will not win in back to back weeks.

HOW WERE THEY TO KNOW DEPT: Mikey P. and Monte Train picked Tiger this week.

Hooray! Boise's Ryan Hietala won the Nationwide Cox Classic event in Omaha. Click on the link to read more:

http://www.idahostatesman.com/sports/story/459599.html

And finally (I promise), this from the LA Times:

"Michelle Wie failed in her eighth attempt to make the cut on the PGA Tour, shooting a second-round 80 at the Legends Reno-Tahoe Open. A quintuple-bogey nine helped push Wie to nine-over 153 at the par-72 Montreux Golf & Country Club."

Click below for more on Wie-Wie:

http://www.pgatour.com/2008/tournaments/r472/08/01/wie.sider2/index.html
Michelle reminds me of an old Japanese proverb, "Women who drive upside down, have crack-up." I know, bad form, bad joke. Personally, I'd give her one more pass to play a Men's event...but from the Women's tees.

Canadian Open

What's in a Name?

Date Written: July 28, 2008

What in the world does the picture of Cher have to do with Chez Reavie winning yesterday's Canadian Open? Hang in there. Hear me out. I'm guessing that Chez's mother knew her son was going to be famous one day so she gave him a first name that people would instantly recognize...kinda like Cher. (And by the way, does anyone out there know if Cher actually has a last name?) Which brings up another question. Why does the media literally miss-pronounce Chez's name? They say it like it's spelled. Do they think, as an audience, we are unable to match his uncommon name to a tricky pronunciation? I've never heard an announcer explain why his name is not pronounced properly. His name is a common word in French. It is pronounced "Shay" which rhymes with way. "Chez" in French essentially means to be at home. Pronounced in English vernacular..."Chez" might be short for Chester, Chezman or Chezburger. It doesn't take Sherlock Holmes or a linquist to figure out that the kid must come from a French background. Is Chez's mother a Francophile? Does she have a sign over the porch that announces you are about to enter, "Chez Reavie?" I remember years ago, before he became famous, that "Goosen" was pronounced "Hoosen."

Finally, although I might be beating a dead cheval, (which, by the way, is French for horse), I think "Shay's" last name should properly be pronounced "Ra-vay" not "Ree-vee." Can anybody out there straighten out this French-to-English mess? Should I email his folks who live in Kansas to get a complete genealogical report? Or should I call the Mormons?

As long as I've got too much time on my hands, allow me just a few more moments to rant about politics before I get to the golf business at hand. This "pronunciation" issue is a comment on our collective laziness as a culture. We (TV being main culprit) have this lazy habit in this country of anglicizing names to suit our own understanding. I liken it to refusing to be a part of the larger world. The fervor that accompanies the argument that "English" is our "one-and-only" designated language represents a "dumbing down" of our potential. I think it would be a good idea to have at least 2 languages in this country, especially in the West...since we essentially swiped this half of the country from either the Indian's or the Mexican's. Maybe it would be a good idea to keep their language and some of their culture. It's a healthy idea too to be different and learn a foreign language during one's lifetime. Besides, I read recently that fifty (50%) percent of the surnames in California are now Spanish. Taking my argument to one last extreme, maybe we ought to learn Ebonics and Computer-ease so that, at the very least, we can relate to the next generation. There is no doubt that the "change train" is leaving the station. According to columnist, Frank Rich in the NY Times:

"Obama-branded change is snowballing, whether it’s change you happen to believe in or not."

O.K...I feel much better now that I've expressed myself. Now back to golf. In my next life I want a demeanor like Chez (however you pronounce it), a swing plane like Anthony Kim and bunker instruction from Mike Weir. Chez becomes the first rookie to win on the PGA TOUR in 2008. He's called, "The Little Unit" (5'9", 160 lbs) in Arizona where he went to college, in deference to "The Big Unit" Randy Johnson who pitches for the Arizona Diamondbacks. He doesn't have nearly the swing speed and plane of Mr. Kim, but he kept it down the middle and got the job done on a rough and tough Glen Abbey Golf Club course. His lay-up on the par-5, eighteenth to secure the victory proved that he's got a brain to go with his game. Read more about this 27-year old by clicking on the link below:

http://thesundevils.cstv.com/sports/m-golf/mtt/reavie_chez00.html

Ten pool players were rewarded with a T-6 for their nationalistic zeal-pick of Mike Weir, he of magnificent up-and-down game. Amazingly, included in those ten who picked him were our three top leaders, Artie, Pat and C. B. Taco.

Onward to the next-in-a-series, over-hyped, WGC's...this one at Firestone in Akron...Tiger-less of course. This begs the question, "just how many World Golf Championships can there be in a year?" Can we have one every week? There's one World Series in baseball. One Super Bowl, one NBA Championship. Oh well. Hyperbole, so dominant within our popular culture, will be a subject for another day. More to the point, there's five Sabbatini-lovers, four Rose nose pickers, and only one No-Show...Davis Love III. Everyone else is in attendance because there's lots of cash involved.

Your faithful blogster,

The British Open

When Irish Eyes are Smiling...

Date Written: July 21, 2008

The headline in the NY Times read, "Steadiness Beats Sentiment as Harrington Prevails." Half the crowd where I live was rooting for Greg Norman at The Open. But everyone I talked too was tickled by Paddy's smile. While the rest of the world of professional golfers "grind" there way to stardom or the poor house, Paddy does it with a smile. His key key to victory? Stay in the moment! Here are his words:

"You know, one of the keys to playing well on Sunday is you don't ever get into the consequences of what you're doing." I did that very well today. I never at any stage -- or if I did for a second or two, I stopped myself -- started to think about what it means to win a second Open, defend an Open, win two majors."

Another quote gleaned from a postgame interview with Greg Norman stuck out at me too:

"A lot of people should take stock no matter how old you are. If you really want to chase something and chase a dream, you can go do it."

Well, yes and no, Greg. I would have qualified his quote to include the words, "within reason." From my vantage point, the world is filled with too many "wanna-be" golfer's who think they "have game."

Kenny Perry stayed home and played well (T-6) at Milwaukee and took additional, unending shit for not showing up at The British. Until he wins a major, he's not going to convince me that he's got more than just a one-dimensional game. Anthony Kim played well enough to suggest he'll win
"a biggee" one day. Too bad he finished with three straight bogies.

One commentator during the telecast said that Tiger doesn't watch golf on TV. How does he know that? Does he (the announcer) spend time in Tiger's house? I think Tiger watches TV, just like the rest of us. I think he was lying on his couch with his knee propped up under a bunch of soft down pillows, watching and wishing he was at Royal Birkdale. Three-over wins it??? Come on! Tiger's human, he's competitive, he's as curious as us other mortals. I can only imagine him salivating at what might have been....potentially his fifteenth major win.

Nationwide Notes: Reigning U.S. Amateur champion Colt Knost shot a 10-under 62 Sunday to cap a four-shot victory in the Nationwide Tour's Price Cutter Charity Championship in Springfield, MO and earn his 2009 PGA Tour card. He earned $108,000 for his second win of the season and jumped from 20th on the money list to second. "The Colt" just happened to make two straight eagles in the middle of his round.

In yet another example of the "The Dumb Rules of Golf," click on the link below to read how Michelle Wie was disqualified at this week's LPGA event:

http://www.latimes.com/sports/la-sp-golf20-2008jul20,0,6218850.story

Best finish in our pool belonged to Jan Jones who picked up a million (double money) with her astute (T-3) pick of Stenson. John Manocheo had Jimmy Furyk and enjoyed a generous payday with his T-5. And Big Ernie, who barely made the cut, shot 141 over the last 36 holes to justify the faith of ten of youse. One more major to go kiddee's. Lord Arthur's lead stretched to about eight hundred grand ahead of Pat Moloney, who jumps into second place. Corn Beef Taco is just a tad behind Pat in third. Canadian Open on tap this week. Ten "homies" love the Weir-wolf.

John Deere Classic

Very Perry

Date Written: July 14, 2008

The headline from the PGA Website calls it, "The Summer of Perry." For yesterday's John Deere win, I would have opted for the headline alliteration, "Perry Putts Perfectly." They (whoever, THEY are), say there's no such thing as a bad putter on tour. So I'm thinking that based on Perry's success this year, he's gotta be high up on the putter rankings. Wrong! Kenny's average of 29 putts per round puts him in 64th place. So now I ask myself, how else can we statistically explain this extraordinary run he's having so far this year, ($4.3 mil)? So campers...here they are, his overall stats: He's 2nd in scoring (duh), 9th in G.I.R., 13th in proximity to the hole, 27th in driving distance, 46th in scrambling and 104th in driving accuracy percentage. But we all know that winning and losing comes down to putting...especially on the last nine holes on Sundays. Yesterday, he made a bunch of crucial, par-saving putts and eeked out an overtime win. He's definitely on a roll...got his Kaintucky, 3-plane swing in gear. He's now won three times this year, (The Memorial and Buick, as well as yesterday's John Deere), finished 2nd at the AT&T Classic and T-3 at the Bob Hope. And for good measure, don't forget that he contended at The Players until a disastrous fourth round.

Plenty has been written about Kenny's decision to NOT play the U.S. Open and The British, so I'll not re-hash his thinking...much. Suffice to say, he's sticking to his guns with his schedule. From what I've gleaned, he likes to play on courses he likes, not play on courses that don't suit his game and he'd rather not play in cold weather. On the other hand, Jerry Kelly (who is as passionate about Wisconsin as Perry is about Kentucky), gets into The British Open as a second alternate and says, "I'm excited to play. I was not going to pass up this chance to play The British even though I consider the Milwaukee Open my fifth major." As the gamblers say, "Go Figure."

Smarter people than I are also questioning Perry's logic. Peter Dawson, British Open Chief said:

"I can't pretend I understand Kenny Perry's decision," stated Dawson. "He's having a great run and we are very sorry he's not here. I find it disappointing. You're not going to win majors if you don't enter and I think the history books show that majors are what you are remembered for."

In our funky, fantasy pool, Denny From Iowa, Bob Bruce and John "Vegas" Manocheo had Kenny to win and collected his prize money of three quarters of a million for their choice. By my count, there are now six pool players who have picked three winners this year. At this stage of the fantasy race, that is amazing. In Bob Bruce's case, he leaps into fourth place. Denny and John move up a couple of spots off the deck.

Double money on tap this week in The British. Alas and Alack dept: Poor Matt Kendrick figured Tiger as a "shoo-in" at Royal Birkdale. I heard Tiger's gonna go over to Matt's house and watch it with him from his couch...explaining to him how he would have played each shot and offer to buy him dinner at Despo's just in case he loses.

Ten of youse think this will be Big Ernie's week and six think Sergio's gonna play back to last year debacle.

Final note: 40 year old Rick Price won the richest Nationwide event ever to clinch a spot on the PGA Tour next year. Rick has been a fixture at Q-School... he's been there nineteen (19) times! Talk about perseverance.

A T & T

Terrific Talent, Bad Belt Buckle

Date Written: July 7, 2008

Superlatives are flying around the golfing planet today. Words like superstar, national treasure, face-of-the-future. All to explain Anthony Kim's solid, second victory of the season at the Tiger-less AT&T. Add to the accolades: Nick "The-Stick" Faldo thinks that the kid has a game to match the remaining two major venues, Royal Birkdale and Oakland Hills.

Methinks it's a bit early in the historical game to liken Kim to that other good young player of ten years ago, but he seems to be learning fast. A great, one-piece swing and an attitude that can only serve him well. One of the commentators on the telecast suggested yesterday that he's the best young player NOT to have won a major. That kind of dialogue used to be reserved for Charles Howell, III, Sergio Garcia, Justin Rose and Adam Scott. I'm rooting for Kim. Young, smallish, from L.A., Asian background. It's obviously clear he has talent, but the best thing is, he's putting that talent to work. My only complaint is his fashion choice of over-sized, sometimes, diamond-studded belt buckles. Talk about tacky.

More about Kim from more-qualified experts:

"Anthony's got such a good looking swing," playing mate, Dean Wilson said. "He hits the ball solidly all the time and hits it hard. He's excited about playing. He plays hard. He wants to be in the limelight. He craves that, as a matter of fact. He's got exceptional skills and I think we are just seeing the tip of the iceberg with this kid, he's got real talent.

Fred Funk, who first met Kim when he was 15 years old and already hitting it 320 yards, agreed.

"He's fearless and he's got tremendous length for a little guy, and he's just got that arrogance, cocky attitude that you need to have when he's in the position that he's in, and he's got the game to back it up," Funk said. "So that's all that really needs to be said."

Mark O'Meara was heard to say that young Mr. Kim's swing is better than his good friend, Tiger's at this age 23.

Three of us pool-players had the good sense to pick Robert Allenby in Tiger's Tourney. One lousy shot kept us from second place and a pile of dough.

Onward to The Tractor (John Deere) Open...being played somewhere in the Heartland that was last seen floating away from the recent floods. Nine Tim Clark's this week.

Finally, from the LA Times:

"Without Woods, the crowd at Sunday's final round of the AT&T National at Congressional was down about 7,000 to 30,000, according to the Washington Post. And Saturday's third-round crowd of 22,311 was down about 15,000 from last year, according to the Baltimore Sun.

In a word: bad. The overnight ratings for Sunday's fourth round of the AT&T National on CBS were down 48%, from a 2.9 to a 1.5. The third-round overnight ratings were down 35%, from a 2.0 to a 1.3."

The Buick Open

Woodhead and Bubba

Date Written: June 30, 2008

Kenny Perry's second victory of the season rested on the putters of the two "W's, "Woodhead" Austin and Watson, Bubba. Austin three-putted for bogey on the last two holes (albeit from distance) and Watson couldn't make a 12-footer for birdie on the 72nd hole to tie so Perry wins his second tournament of the year.

"I threw it away," said "The Woodhead," whose demonstrative ways led him to cup a ball and slam it against the wood board marking the seventh tee. "I didn't hit the ball close enough to the hole the last two holes to counteract my yips. I've got to figure it out or I'd better quit." In Woodhead and Bubba's good company, Dudley "The Dud" Hart collected four bogies over the last seven holes to sub-marine his chances to win.

From the PGA Tour website: "Kenny Perry, winner of yesterday's Buick Open, will honor his commitment to play in the U.S. Bank Championship in Milwaukee rather than the British Open. He's a former champ at Brown Deer Park, so who knows what might happen there." Which brings into focus, once again, Johnny Miller's critique of Perry's decision NOT to play at Torrey Pines in the U.S. Open. Now, Perry's supporters will have some additional explaining to do. Mr. Weenie, (er, Perry) will not appear in the British Open in a month. Not to beat a dead horse, but this is a guy who wants desperately to play international competition in the Ryder Cup? What would you rather have...a trophy from a minor tour event called Milwaukee or be known as the Open Champion for the rest of your life? No contest from this quarter.

Mikey P. jumps a few spots in the standings with a rare pick of Kenny Perry to win The Buick Open. Miracle dart-throwin' Mikey.

"Woodheads" two three-wacks cost T & A, Perry Sato and Doug B. a shot at a bunch of top money. Perry's eagle from the bunker at 14 didn't help their cause either.

On to the Tiger-less sponsored AT&T in DC. Question of the week: Why do you think that in baseball, they call these, "the dog days?"

The Travelers

'N Cink

Date Written: June 23, 2008

The word among serious journalists is that bloggers are way too harsh. Forgive me Father, for I have sinned. Please hear my confession. I am guilty...guilty of a lot of things including bad blogging. In my defense though, you must understand...I can't help myself. Sometimes my six year old bathroom humor gets the best of me. I know in my heart that it's cheap to make fun of another because their name happens to be weird. Take "Cink" for example. It's way too easy to conjure up all kinds of bathroom and golf analogies. Can't you see how easy it is to substitute words like tank, drain, toilet, sewer, poo-poo, flush...whatever, to describe one's golf game? 'N Cink hisself would probably be the first to admit that his inablitity to "finish" hasn't been realized. He's blown a bunch of opportunities to win in his career. Because he's been such a highly-regarded player, he must know that he has to endure the bad metaphors to his last name. Hence the photo above might represent all his missed opportunities. Despite my attempts at bad humor, I am really not alone in my opinion. A dry and sober quote from a real journalist affiliated with the Associated Press said, "Stewart Cink has a reputation as a good golfer who just can't finish off a tournament."

Well...Stewie "The Cink" tried hard to live DOWN to his reputation at this past weekend's Traveler's. He hit a couple of shots on the last nine holes that even had the TV commentators scratching their collective heads. He fatted a wedge on a par four that was 40 yards short of his target. Then, on the 72nd hole, leading by one shot, he hit a giant 365 yard, blocked drive that some estimated was 50 yards offline. Luckily, he managed to convert each frightful miscue (read "choke") into an up-and-down par, thereby avoiding a playoff with defending champ, Hunter Mahan and aging Tommy Armour, III. In one last attempt at bad, childish humor; if back-nine stress is the primary cause of hair loss, it's no wonder Mr. Cink's going bald.

T'was a nice payoff for seven of us who just missed with Mahan to repeat...Lord Kerrick being one of the astutes. Corn Beef Taco's standing in third place was also greased a bit.

Onward to the next, Tiger-less tour stop, The Buick Open in Michigan. The field looks like a Nationwide event, with most of the bigger names taking the week off. Now we can begin the countdown to The British. We are only five weeks away from their OPEN which will, obviously, be Tiger-less too. As a matter of fact, the whole next year just might be Tiger-less, given the severity of the damage to his ACL and micro-fractures to the tibia of his left leg.

In this celebrity-driven, market-oriented world, the question arises, what's an event worth without a headliner? The PGA has long known the value of Tiger as it translates to the TV engine that runs their machine. Without question, their ratings will plummet. When and if Tiger ever decides to retire, the Tour will have to renegotiate their TV contract downward. For now, we'll have to endure a different spin that will come from their publicity machine. They will try to somehow convince us that there product is still valuable to watch without Tiger in attendance. I'll just say good luck. Anybody out there want to watch 3 hours of golf to eventually see a playoff between Tim Herron and Dudley Hart?

Lastly this week, I hope Tiger comes to the realization that he doesn't need to kill himself in the gym in order to play well. Slow down pal, you've got a whole life to live. If you need a golfing fix, we've got a skins game on Sundays up here in Idaho which you could play left-handed. I can almost guarantee you can make twenty bucks a week.

U.S. Open

One-Legged Tiger

Date Written: June 17, 2008

Golf on Monday. What could be better? Maybe random sex with Michelle Pfeiffer, but short of that longshot fantasy, how about a playoff for the U.S. Open? The match-up of everyman (Rocco Mediate) against the best player who ever lived playing on one leg.

Rocco was great. Even though I was one of the thirteen in the fantasy pool who was grateful that Tiger squeaked out the win, I was secretly rooting for Rocco. Forty five years old, bad back, one-way ball flight, great attitude, ferocious competitor, shaky putter at times, terrific sense of humor, blah, blah. He was terrific. At the very least, Rocco Mediate is now a national household name.

The tour has figured out how to handicap Tiger...make him play on one leg. I thought at times that he was going to withdraw but he hung tough. Having personally survived 3 left knee operations and finally knee replacement surgery, I want to know what drugs Tiger took to make it through to the end. I would guess there was a cortisone shot somewhere between day three and day four. Roger Maltbie (Johnny Miller's, Ed McMahon) claimed he only used over-the-counter (Advil?) medication. I doubt it. If you want to read more about the possibilities for a long layoff for Tiger, click on the Thomas Bonk article:

http://www.latimes.com/sports/la-sp-bonk17-2008jun17,0,4051577.column

And if you really have some extra time on your hands, read this David Brooks editorial about Tiger's focus:

http://www.nytimes.com/2008/06/17/opinion/17brooks.html?hp

Remember the answer to the old golf joke, "How did you make a nine on a hole?" The answer, "Well, I missed my putt for eight" applies to San Diego homie, "Lefty Mick." He's playing the relatively easy par five thirteenth on day three. He misses the fairway with his drive and has to lay up with his second shot. Then he gets too cute with his third shot, an L-wedge to a front hole location just five paces from the edge and spins it off the green. He switches to his 64-degree wedge, but needs three more tries before getting the ball to stay on the green. He then proceeds to three-putt. Voila...NINE! Hackers could be heard harmonically rejoicing around the world.

We have now played exactly two-thirds of the pool schedule. Big time changes were effected what with the massive double money allotted to the majors. Biggest move was at the top where Lord Arthur of Kerrick and Pat Moloney are now leading at over the $7 Mil mark. Move over Vinegar Man, it was a nice run. Personally it feels good to get out of the cellar but in a perfect world I didn't want so much company.

Stanford/St. Jude

Mass Suicide

Date Written: June 9, 2008

"The Mechanic," (Justin Leonard) prevails in a three-way playoff for the Stanford/St. Jude title. Robert Allenby learns what its like to finally lose after winning ten straight playoffs in his pro career. Trevor Immelman has recovered from his all-to-hectic ("tsk, tsk") Master's TV tour. Those could have been the headlines for the week but Yours Truly is always looking for the "under story," the "fuck-up" if you will. The real headline from Memphis should have read, "Mass Suicide" or perhaps, "The Cutters." After the game, Dean Wilson, Gavin Coles, Tim Clark and Marc Turnesa were last seen in the Memphis men's locker room huddled over a package of double-edge razors, deciding who would go first. Two doubles in the last three holes for Dean-O did him in. Little Gavin Coles was just behind him in the futility department...doubling the 72nd hole to miss the playoff by two. Earlier in the day, third-round leader Tim Clark triple-bogeyed the first hole and Marc Turnesa, did him one better; he made a quad on #1. To quote Phillies baseball manager, Danny Ozark, "'Half this game is ninety percent mental."

High winds, hot temperatures, sloping greens running near 15 on the Stimp and tucked pins all added up 4-under being good enough to tie for first. You can add the TPC course in Memphis to the short list of U.S. Open-type courses. Last weeks Muirfield/Memorial was no piece of cake either. But those courses are merely hors d'oeuvres for the main meal that's coming this week, Torrey de la Pines.

So gentlemen, as they say at Indianapolis, "Start Your Engines." Oil up the remote. Make sure your TIVO's set for overtime on Sunday. We get some serious wall-to-wall television starting Thursday. Tiger has thirteen of us wondering if he's fit to go. The dummies who thought at the beginning of the year that he would be a "slamdunk" on his favorite venue, are now re-thinking after his third left knee surgery. Someone told me yesterday that Tiger was still limping. I hope not. If he is, I might have to have my best friend Guido to "rearrange" both his kneecaps...ala Tonya Harding. On a lighter side, maybe it's only fair to the field that he be "handicapped" in some way. Three dreamers will get to see if Philly Mick's up to the task in his backyard sandbox. I heard he's just bringing fourteen wedges.

No movement in the pool. Good on Bob Bruce with his T-8 pick of the pro from Yiddish C.C., Scott Verplunked.

The Memorial

Miller Lite

Date Written: June 2, 2008

Seven pool players picked Kenny Perry to win The Memorial. Nice dart throwing kiddees. Y'all pad your accounts by over a million smackers and tighten up the race for second place. Kenny joins Tiger as only the second player to win Jack's tourney three times. Quite an feat! The win will surely guarantee Kenny's presence on Paul Azinger's Ryder Cup team. "Zinger" couldn't possibly leave him off the team which will play at Valhalla in Perry's home state of Kentucky after this win. Kenny has had such a nice run over the last month, first at The Player's and then his overtime loss at the AT&T in Atlanta. Perry has clearly proven his mettle.


From Dave Shedloski, of the PGA Tour:
"Long grass and long faces. Furrowed sand in the bunkers and furrowed brows. Fast greens and blue moods. The Muirfield Village course's ankle-deep rough swallowed up errant shots and its greens were as slick as glass. Only three players broke 70 in round two. Twenty players couldn't break 80."

From Tom Lehman:
"Mr. Nicklaus is getting exactly what he's hoping for. He's got a major championship-type feel to this place. The place is like a U.S. Open. We were talking about that on the first tee. The greens, the pins, the rough, the speed of the fairways ... it's not over the top, but it's very tough."

Now campers, back to the reason that Johnny Miller's mug shot is the featured image of the week. I actually tried to manipulate my computer to graphically put a foot in his mouth but I couldn't do it...I don't have any Adobe skills. To those of us who question from time to time if Johnny's comments are suspect; I offer the following: Johnny opined at The Player's that Kenny couldn't win on any US Open type course because he's only got a right-to-left game. Johnny has proven to many over time that he sometimes doesn't know from whence he speaks. As per Tom Lehman's comments above, Muirfield was just about as tough as any course the boys have seen this year and Master Perry was flawless. So once again, Johnny's "expert" testimony comes into question.

From the college ranks:
WEST LAFAYETTE, Ind. (AP) -- UCLA's Kevin Chappell shot a 76 on Saturday to wrap up the NCAA men's individual golf championship and help the Bruins hold off Pac-10 rivals Stanford and Southern California for the team title.

Locally, in the, "This Is Your Year" department: our blind-lucky pool leader, Scott Winegar of Boise fame, one-hopped a 6-iron into the eleventh hole at Elkhorn Golf Course during last week's 2-day, Sun Valley Pro-Am. This was no cheap shot...166 yards over water onto a skinny green surrounded by nearly "Muirfield" rough in semi-rainy conditions.

Six Toms, four Austin's and four Snedeker's in Memphis this coming week. Then, on to Tiger's return to Torrey.

Finally, finally: In fairness, if "Hoof 'n Mouth Miller" wanted to further pursue his "ball flight" argument against Mr. Perry, he would surely point to Kenny's postgame Memorial announcement that he has never played well at Torrey Pines and that he's going to skip it. Maybe I'm too harsh on Miller Lite?

The Colonial

Lefty's Magic

Date Written: May 26, 2008

Call him by his rightful name, "Houdini" Mickelson. Lefty, "chained" to a wayward drive, deep in the trees, pulls the proverbial live rabbit out of his hat with a wedge shot on the 72nd hole to deny Rod Pampling and Tim Clark a chance at a playoff. Pool players, Jimbo Brady, Mikey P. and Louie/Margaret must have been on the edge of their couch, licking their collective chops, when they saw his second shot dilemma. Then they were left on the carpet...totally deflated by Lefty's luck/pluck. By the bye, six of us got zilch with Verplunk's MC on a course suited to his game. Drat!

Thank god for TIVO. There were some difficult choices to make on the bulb Sunday. The Clayton Kershaw Era finally arrived at Dodger Stadium, the Lakers were playing the dreaded Spurs, and, of course, the golf. It took me well into Monday to finally view all the outcomes. And...I had to play eighteen holes too at Sun Valley. To paraphrase Hemingway, "Life is full." I can only add, "When's dinner ready Honey?"

Seven "Perry's" and six "O'Hair's at "Jack's" Memorial this week. No Tiger. Apparently not enough rehab yet on the ailing knee. If he decides that he's not one hundred per cent before the US Open, there will be twelve of us who will be pissed.

AT&T Classic

The 18th at Sugarloaf

Date Written: May 19, 2008



Try hitting a shot from a downhill lie with a five wood that requires a carry of 270 yards over water to a tucked pin with the wind howling in your face. Add in the fact that you are in a sudden-death playoff with a $300,000 difference in prize money and 20,000 screaming fans. In the, "What Was He Trying to Accomplish Scenario," Kenny Perry tried to pull off this miracle shot against the youngster, Ryuchi Imada. He blocked it, hit a tree that boomeranged the ball back over the green and into the drink. End of dialogue. Master Doyle contends he was just trying to hit it right so he would have a lot of green to work with for his third shot and was unlucky to hit the tree. I don't know about that.

Hindsight is very cheap but a lot of fun. If I had been Perry, hitting first, I would have been thinking "lay-up" and let the kid go for it and die. He obviously didn't listen to me yelling at him through my TV. Great drama turned to tragedy. It's been an expensive two weeks that have cost Kenny a pile of dough. But that's football.

To his credit, Ryuchi looked unflappable during the last nine holes. He said in a post game interview that he never believed in destiny, but now that he has won this event, (after losing in a playoff last year to Zach Johnson), he might change his mind. Ryuchi's definitely got game. In addition to winning for the first time yesterday, he's got two second-place finishes at The Buick and The Pods and a fifth at L.A. this year. Pencil him in Paul for a Ryder Cup spot.

News of note: The telecast started with Honolulu's own, Parker McLachlin, he of horrible, Oakley golf pants fame, consterned over a 75 foot bunker shot on the driveable 13th. He hits the perfect shot and splashes it into the cup for an eagle and a three stroke lead. At the time, he had this incredible round going...8-under. Poor kid...like most of us, he couldn't stand success. From then on, he appeared to be thinking, "way too much." He took an inordinate amount of time over every shot and proceeded to bogey three of the last 5 holes. He took so much time to figure out what to do on the eighteenth that I was thinking of nick-naming him, "Part-Time." He was slower than Glen "All" Day or Ben "Forever" Crane. Anyway, "Part-Time" took what seemed like half an hour waiting for wind conditions to change on his second shot. I took a short nap on the couch, I went to the refrigerator three times and the bathroom twice before he eventually decided to lay up on the treacherous par five. He makes bogey anyway. Whatever happened to the PGA's 45 seconds per shot rule?

Seven of us, including our esteemed pool leader, Scott Winegar, won substantial third place loot with our pick of the "Ice Cream Man," Mr. "Vee-Jay-Gas." For those that care about fashion, Camillo wore all-white which is, in most cases, a definite fashion no-no. But he shot a nifty 31 on the last nine holes to miss the playoff by one shot. Drat! I had him in the pool. I'm finally able to creep out of the cellar, but could have done alot better. The marvelous team of T & A gets to ponder the view from the Cropper (last place).

In the, "So You Fancy Yourself a Player and You Think It's Easy to be a Pro Department:" Idaho's own, young Tyler Aldridge, who qualified for the Nationwide Tour through Q-School, has now played in eight tournaments and won a grand total of $1,845.00. That's barely meal money. It's a steep learning curve, no matter the endeavor, when one ventures outside their small neighborhood in search of fame. Click on the link below to read about another young Idaho golfer, Troy Merritt, who's gonna follow his dream:

http://www.idahostatesman.com/sports/story/384802.html

"The Big Show" meanders back to Fort Worth, Texas for the Crowne Plaza Invitational, formally known as, "The Colonial." It's played on an old-style course that is consistently rated as one of the best courses in the country. The par-70 track favors us old foggie's who are short and who can shape a shot. Corey "The Gutty Little Bruin" Pavin loves it and has always played well here. Corey is said to have never "envisioned" a straight shot to a pin...my kind of guy. If you are interested in reading about the history of Colonial click on:

http://www.colonialfw.com/Default.aspx?p=DynamicModule&pageid=255398&ssid=115072&vnf=1

Six of us think Scott Verplank's got the perfect game for Colonial and four voted for Jerry Kelly.

The Players

Sergio Finds "The Love"



Date Written: May 12, 2008



SV Fantasy Pool players Jan Jones and Doug B. get off the deck and Mike Mundell leaps from fifteenth to third in the standings by their stellar pick of Sergio to win at The Players. It was the biggest payoff of the year....$1,710,000.


To paraphrase my plumber, my Cink went in the toilet! So...what else is new?

For the rest of the planet, it was terrific TV. Personally, I was rooting for the underdog; he of dippy, guided swing, Paul Goydos. Paul missed a couple of ten footers down the stretch and bogeyed the tough eighteenth to allow Sergio to join him in a playoff at five under. First up on the first extra hole at Sawgrass, the dreaded seventeenth; a gust of wind caused Goydos' ball to balloon in the drink. But we shouldn't feel too sorry for him...he wins over one million smackers for finishing second. Besides, he won the hearts of most sportsmen with his graciousness in defeat. After the round, he said that no one could deny Sergio's ball-striking advantage on the very tough course. The part of Sergio's game that did need some attention over the past couple of years, his putting, improved immensely during the final round. Judging from the picture above, he has certainly found, "The Love."

According to T.J. Auclair, a PGA interactive partner (whatever that is), Sergio holed a combined 126 feet, 10 inches worth of putts, about 30 feet more than anyone else in the field. Contrary to Johnny Miller's, "putt faster" advice, kudos must go to Stan Utley, the putting guru, for helping Sergio with his mechanics. I wish Stan would come to Sun Valley and give me a tip or twelve.

At least Johnny was right about Kenny Perry's, one-dimensional, right-to-left ball flight. Poor Kenny, leading the whole shebang going into round four, shot a nifty 81. So much for not being able to "shape" the ball on a course that demands more creativity.

Finally, in the segment I call, "So You Want to go to Dinner With Your Hero?" You better re-think extending an invitation to a formal dinner party to our very own, "Gomer Pyle," Boo Weekley. "Gomer" can flush a golf ball but if your mother or your girlfriend happens to be an English teacher and they are seated next to "Gomer" at dinner, look out! When asked if he watched the Players Championship on television when he was growing up, he said, "I didn't watch no golf. I didn't even know who done won. I reckon Phil won it last year... there you go." This begs a question...was our hero Boo, asleep down 'dare in Milton, FLA during Mrs. Barrett's English class? I figure he most prob'ly needed a little shut eye after staying up all night with his friends drinking bourbon shooters and shooting turkeys.

Wachovia Championship

The Year of the Kid

Date Written: May 5, 2008
I'm writing most of this before the last round of The Wachovia because after watching "The Kid," Anthony Kim, play round three, there's no way he loses. He's got a swing plane to die for, a swing speed that approaches 130 M.P.H. which allows hime to hit it a mile and he putts the eyes off the ball. He's the perfect gamblers definition of "chalk," which in the slang dictionary is, "the expected outcome, especially in a sporting event. The term is derived from, "you can chalk that up right now, we don't even have to see it!" To add to the story, in the process of winning, "The Kid" breaks Tiger's tournament record on a very tough course by three shots.

For those who have been on another planet for the last two years and are in need of some background on "The Kid," I've gleaned the following from the PGA Tour website:

Anthony Kim turned professional in August, 2006 after three years at the University of Oklahoma. He received a sponsor exemption into the Valero Texas Open and finished T-2 in his PGA Tour debut, earning an exemption into the following week's Southern Farm Bureau Classic. In just two starts, Kim earned $338,067. He also competed in two Nationwide Tour events. As an amateur, he was a three-time All-American (2004-2006) and NCAA Freshman of the Year (2004) at Oklahoma. He was one of three finalists for 2006 Ben Hogan Award. He garnered two victories as a junior and was a four-time American Junior Golf Association All-American. He finished his last college season as the seventh-ranked golfer by Golfweek. Kim was a member of the victorious 2005 United States Walker Cup team along with J.B. Holmes, Nicholas Thompson and Jeff Overton, all rookies on the TOUR in 2006. He lists winning The Walker Cup as his biggest thrill in golf, thus far.

Here's the back story I remember. Young hotshot Kim figures he's bigger and better than the program at Oklahoma and squabbles with his coach. He decides to leave college after his junior year and turn pro...a typical big ego story that's usually associated with high school basketball players who think they can skip college and start in the NBA. In Kim's case, he was right. He's got a game that can match his ego. One can only hope that he will mature and cool his jets a bit, emotionally.

If you want to know more about "The Kid" and his relationship with his overbearing, "Little League" father, click on the link below for an in-depth bio written August 3, 2007, by GolfWorld writer, John Strege:

http://www.golfdigest.com/golfworld/2007/08/gw070803kidswagger

One of the TV commentators suggested on Saturday that a big talented rookie comes along about every ten years. Well...it's been about ten years since a kid named Tiger burst on the scene. We'll see if Kim is the second "Korean Komet" (K.J. Choi being the first). In any event, he's the eighth "under-30 year old" to win this year and it's only May.

Last tidbit (I promise) from the PGA website about, "The Kid:"

"The best way to describe how Kim has changed was not the long drives and six birdies Saturday, it was a short punch out on the third hole, when he decided not to try a low-percentage shot to reach the green. Six months ago I would tried to go for it, and there was double or triple bogey written all over that," Kim said. "I chipped out, saved par, and that kept my round going. Little things like that have added to some good play."

Onward to The Players (and the dreaded 17th hole) where a bunch of money's at stake. Five of youse think Adam Scott will win. Adam's on a roll. He followed up his win at the Lord Byron with a T-8 at Wachovia.

Nothing new...it's either Cink or swim for me.

EDS Byron Nelson

The Pro From Mars

Date Written: April 28, 2008

Ryan Moore has the weirdest swing I've ever seen. It's beyond, "homemade." Maybe he's really from some other planet? Do they play golf on Mars? His "action" makes Jim Furyk's "loop-de-loop" takeaway look conventional by comparison. At least Furyk has his feet aimed at the target at address. Ryan's almost "perpendicular" left. His set-up makes me wonder if he has ever suffered from the dreaded disease called, "double cross." You know that shot. The one where you aim left to hit a fade and then cross over and actually hook it out-of-bounds? How Ryan finally "gets" to the ball from the top is a minor physical miracle and how he replicates this action is equally astounding. If I had to bet, I'd put my money on someone else every time. That said, he's finished twice, four times on tour and he more than held his own before bowing to Adam Scott in a four-hole playoff at the Lord Byron Open. Way-to-technical, Peter Kostis, with his slow-action, Konica-Bizhub-Bullshit swing analyzer, had the good sense not to criticize Ryan's unique action. He did a fairly good job of explaining the swing-angle adjustments that he has to make to get square to the ball at the bottom.

One last comment on Ryan Moore's fashion choices: join Jesper and Shingo and shitcan the dippy chapeau.

Me and Cropper didn't do too well in the Oasis Best Ball in Twin Falls this past weekend. If they had a category for oldest players in the field, we would have won. As it was, we finished in the middle of the pack of 40 teams in the championship division. I'll just keep fooling myself with the explanation that it's still early in the season and my game has yet to round into form.

A bunch of Cink's and Oberholser's this week in The Wachovia. I read somewhere that Oberholser's entire body needs repair and he only played The Masters because it's what it is...The Masters. He's going to quit playing for awhile, until he's healed. And sure enough, he's a No Show and five of us are out of luck this week. How am I ever going to get out of the basement?

Toughest courses on tour???? Click on the link if you think it's Augusta:

http://www.latimes.com/sports/la-spw-bonk26apr26,1,333384.story

The Heritage

Back-to-Back Boo, Boo

Date Written: April 21, 2008


Boo "The Chew" Weekley repeats at The Heritage. This is a tough thing to do, having only been done twice before by Mssrs. Payne Stewart and DL III. Mr. Boo, looks just like a compilation of the guys I used to play with in the fifty's at Rancho Park in L.A. (read Rick Reilly's masterpiece, "Missing Links" for a sense of the characters I grew up with.) Occasionally wearing army surplus pants, an oversized shirt that's definitely not on any color chart and what looks like old-style tennis shoes, Boo has set fashion back to the dark ages. Add a big wad of chew oozing sticking through his cheek and dribbling down his chin, a limited, good-ole-boy vocabulary and a strong left hand grip, and Boo will never be mistaken for the a player from the country club set. But unbeknownst to the golfing population at large, our loveable, homegrown Florida Panhandle hustler has figured out how to repeat his dippy, "shut" muni swing and beat-up on the Polo-wearing set. The truth is he has more of arrows in his quiver than most of his stuffy peers. He was mostly straight off the tee which killed half the competition. Then, he unveiled a low punch shot that he could deftly move left or right under the tall, moss-hanging trees that guarded greens as small as postage stamps. In truth, he was a tad bit lucky...chipping in twice from awkward spots on the last day to maintain his comfortable lead. But, as it turned out, he was never threatened...ahead all day long. Remember last year when he chipped in twice on the last two holes to squeek by Big Ernie? He ought to think about building another house on the course or at least buying a power boat to host a beer cruise every year in good Carolina coastal fashion.

Boating aside, Boo "The Chew" makes "Pat M." and "The Donald" almost millionaires for their heady pick of him to repeat. "The Donald" (last year's pool winner), jumps from 9th to 4th in the standings and Pat closes the gap on his associate, Scott Winegar. Artie, Monte Train and Bob Lutz hustled up the standings with a T-2 on the back of "The Aaron of Baddeley." They added nearly half mil to their totals. In my next life, I don't care how many winners I can pick, I just want to putt like Badds.

The Tour schleps back to Texas this coming week. Seven Donald's, five Sabbo's and three Campbell's are the consensus picks at the EDS-Byron Nelson at the TPC in Irving. T&A and Doc 'N Jill think the Yiddish pro, Scott Verplunked, will repeat.

Stating the obvious, yours truly, has been in a holding pattern for the entire season...DEAD LAST! "Steady as a Cropper" I've been for weeks now. Y'all remember the dreaded Cropper Bros? I used to make fun of them on a weekly basis when they were mired miles behind the pack. Oh well! My current standing is probably just cosmic pay-back for my years of witless sarcasm aimed at the them.

P.S. In the "Miracles Can Happen" category, I did learn one thing from Peter Kostis' "Konica Bizhub Swing Analysis" feature. But I'm not going to tell you in case we meet in the semi's of the club championship.

P.P.S. Anyone see Jeff Wong's name on the leader board this past week?

The Masters

Trevor Forever

Date Written: April 14, 2008

It was refreshing to watch Trevor Immelman hold off the best player on the planet and win his first major yesterday. Reams have already been written about the outcome, so I won't bore you. God missed a few short putts and finished in second place, three back. It would have been five if Trevor didn't have a brain freeze on the par three sixteenth.

Gary Player, Immelman's idol, gave him some nice advice before the last round. He told the kid to be tough! Player even went public to liken Trevor's swing to Ben Hogan's. Player's been around so long he probably played in the 40's and 50's with Bantam Ben. Still, the compliment was not trivial. Even Tiger admitted "post game" that Trevor is a fine player and should win a few majors in years to come.

Mr. Tiger's not only chasing Nicklaus' record of eighteen winning majors, but nineteen major second-place finishes. And for those that care, nine third place major finishes. Now, those are staggering numbers. Tiger's gaining in all categories. He finished second yesterday for the second year in a row at Augusta. The question of the day is...how many times now has he finished second in a major? Answer below.

In our trusty pool, eight of you, including our esteemed leader, Scott Winegar, had Tiger for a double payoff of $1,620,000. Scotty extended his lead to roughly 1.7 mil over his business partner, Pat Moloney. These two dudes run an event management business, headquartered in Boise, which begs the question, what's in the water over there? Both Scott and Pat play a decent, single digit game but they appear to be "scratch" players when it comes to picking winners. They also run a very nifty, "Boys On Tour" annual golf tournament that travels the West each year. Scotty does throw us a bone this coming week...he has Adam Scott who's a No Show. Poor Adam got a slight cold and cancelled.

Back to reality this week at the Heritage...DL III's favorite digs. Longtime golfing buddy and semi-scratch, Jeff Wong, now hangs there with the cutest Kelly on the planet. The Wonger was last seen tending bar at Sea Pines and playing a lot of golf. Mother Fudder!

In answer to the question, Tiger has been second five times in majors, including three times in the last five and four in the last 12.

The Shell Open

The "Hooters" Open


Date Written: April 7, 2008


Johnson (Two Last Names) Wagner held it together to win in Houston. He gets his first win on tour, a two year exemption and best of all, he gets to play at Augusta this coming week. What a week for the 29-year old.

Doug B's stellar (T-2) pick of Chad Campbell jumps him to over a mil in the fantasy pool standings. John M. closed the gap a bit at the top of the standings with a solid (T-11) Stricker finish. The nine of us in the pack who picked Appleby (T-26) are still waiting for him to mount a charge.

Other reports from various golf websites in italics. Author's comments in red:

• John Daly withdrew from the Houston Open on Friday after a double bogey on the par-3 16th hole, his seventh hole in the second round. Citing a back injury. Daly was playing on another sponsor exemption. He opened with a 78 and would've missed the cut. Daly was making his ninth start in an already dismal year. He backed out of the Bob Hope Chrysler Classic with a rib injury, missed four cuts and was kicked out of the Arnold Palmer Invitational presented by MasterCard after missing his pro-am tee time. That same day, he found out swing coach Butch Harmon had fired him.

And this from Dave Kaplan, AT&T Tournament Director said. "I think people want to see John, whether they are going to come to see him as a train wreck, or to see him as a golfer, that's in their minds, but I think John would add to our tournament."

I think train wreck. Is it weird that as part of the human race we have an interest in watching someone kill themselves? Ask any substance abuse veteran and they will tell you that Big John's in Big Trouble.

• Adam Scott, with a second-round 76, was 13-strokes higher than his 63 in his first round. That is the largest number for Scott since following up a 67 in Round Two of the 2006 PLAYERS Championship with an 82 in Round Three. According to the PGA, he got strep throat.

I'd get a cough too, shooting a 13-shot differential from day one to day two. Methinks he wanted to scoot over to Augusta and get in some practice licks.

• When play was called on the second day, the par-4 18th hole was ranked as the most difficult in Round Two, more so for none other than Alejandro Canizares. When he got to the 18th tee, he was 3 under for the tournament. When he left the 18th, he was 9 over for the tournament. Four consecutive balls in the water off the tee lead to a 12.

Another "mahvelous" train wreck. When I read this the first time I wondered how one could go from 3 under to 9 over on one hole. That's actually more than a twelve on the hole but rather a 12-shot swing on one hole. The author of the blurb didn't do the math. In reality, he shot 3 under (69) the first day and was 13 over (85) on day two, including his stellar 12 on eighteen, which he was playing as his ninth hole. He blew 4 shots in the water. Whatever the large number, we can all relate to a giant blow-up hole.

Buenos Suerte!

Zurich Classic

Voodoo Time

Date Written: March 31, 2008

Artie, Lutzie, Mikey P. and Pat M. were about to make a ton of money on Woody Austin at the Zurich Classic. This caused for some creative thinking at this end because there was too much money at stake for us also-rans in the pool. I sprang into action.

I put the TV on pause and went to find Maudie, my trusted "Nawlins" voodoo doll. I found her buried deep in a hallway closet, resting upside down in her miniature pine coffin. I pryed open the coffin and found the long straight pins that allow her to do her long-distance magic. I returned to my easy chair and re-started the telecast. I waved "Maudie" three times in front of Woody Austin who was on the eighteenth tee and stuck four pins in crucial locations in her body that have long been known by voodoo experts to cause erratic behavior. May God forgive me but I had to do this.

"Woodhead," probably had no idea of the power of voodoo. He promptly though proceeded to totally butcher the tough par five. He hit one shot out of the rough a grand total of about twenty yards and then dunked his next shot in the water. It ultimately cost him and the four of you who picked him, a ton of money. I felt bad but I felt good. If "Woodhead" makes par on eighteen, y'all win about half a mil. If he makes birdie, you tie for the lead and go into a playoff with Andres Romero to potentially win over a mil. As it turns out, you end up sharing fourth place which is worth about a quarter mil. Now that ain't bad but ain't great. If you happen to run into "Woodhead" (aka Aquaman), don't tell him what I did. He thinks he just "choked his guts out." He has no idea of the power of Maudie. Worst of all for Pat M., he cost him the lead in our pool. Man! It's hard work keeping the leaders in sight.

In a more earthly comment after the telecast, David Cropper, former pool player and 2-handicapper, wondered why Woodhead just didn't hit a three wood off the tee, hit his second shot to wedge distance and maybe make a short putt to send the game into extra innings. We'll never know....but Maudie do.

I count nine Appleby aficionados, three Scott's and three Bubba's as the favorite picks among the faithful this coming week at the Shell in Houston. The Master's, double money and great theatre in less than two weeks.

WGC/CA

Le Roi est Mort

Date Written: March 25, 2008

"The King is dead, long live the King." [1] Or better yet, the streak is dead but long live the feat. It was a good run and fun to speculate on how long it would last. There was some serious talk that he could break Lord Byron's record of eleven straight. It ended being Tiger's first defeat in eight events worldwide since Sept. 3rd. That's LAST YEAR folks! His majesty just missed by in back of the ultimate winner, GOgilvy. A putt here, a putt there...blah, blah. The final leaderboard at the "Blue Weenie" looked like a major. Singh, Furyk, Goosen, Woods...the best players in the world fighting it out down the stretch.

Congrats to the astute twosome of Scott Winegar who jumps into first place and Bob Bruce into fourth place in our funky pool for their pick of GOgilvy. "Mahvelous" John Manocheo relinquishes the top spot, which he held for about ten weeks. GOgilvy, played ridiculously steady...he had only one bogie over 72 holes.

Many tour players consider the Florida part of the Tour the most difficult stretch they will face during the year. By my calculations, playing par golf in FLA during the last four weeks would have made the following dough:

Honda....... $88,000
Pods.......... $127,200
Palmer...... $31,513
WGC/CA.. $42,500
TOTAL......$289,213

Yippee Ki Yo! Arnold Palmer has agreed to host next year's Bob Hope Chrysler Classic. Good riddance to "The Mugger," George Lopez.

If you want a laugh, click on the link below forwarded by local Valley Club legends, Shawn Aicher and Dick Shelton:

http://www.golf.com/golf/video/article/0,28224,1720077,00.html?xid=forecast031008_story4

On to "Nawlins" this week. Not many of the top players in attendance. They're thinkin'..... MASTERS! Five Glover-Lovers and three Tom-Toms.


[1] "The King is dead. Long live the King!"[1] is a traditional proclamation made following the accession of a new monarch in various European and North American countries, particularly in the United Kingdom and Canada. The original phrase was translated from the French Le Roi est mort. Vive le Roi!, which was first declared upon the coronation of Charles VII following the death of his father Charles VI in 1422. In France, the declaration was traditionally made by the Duc d'Uzès, a senior Peer of France, as soon as the coffin containing the remains of the previous king descended into the vault of Saint Denis Basilica. The phrase arose from the law of le mort saisit le vif—that the transfer of sovereignty occurs instantaneously upon the moment of death of the previous monarch.

Arnold Palmer

Ho Hum

Date Written: March 17, 2008

Tiger wins again...YAWN!

As the Jews would say, "So what else is new?"

When he was a mere seven shots behind the Veej after two rounds, was he out of it? NOPE! When he 3-putted from seven feet at ten on Sunday to drop into a tie for the lead, should we have worried? NO AGAIN! He merely had to have a brief talk with himself. He proceeded to calmly grind out par after par before draining a long putt on the eighteenth to win his fifth Palmer title. Not like he hasn't done this before. HO HUM!

I do have one minor complaint to express to Tiger when he calls me later today. I'm gonna tell him to shit-can the fist-pumping/cap-slamming act. It's not very classy.

Corn Beef Taco jumps a spot and Jan and Matt get off the deck with their astute pick of Veej. As I'm writing this weekly drivel, I'm wondering if anyone has ever done the Tiger vs. V.J., head-to-head math. Tiger seems to beat him like a drum when they are both in the mix on Sundays. Luke and Sergio disappointed a bunch of youse. Lukey, by missing the cut by one stroke. Sergio is still on his quest for a repeatable putting stroke. I can relate.

Onward to another WGC (The venue is Doral's Blue Monster course) which, of course, Tiger will win....DUH! Then it'll be on to conquer The Masters and the other majors later this Summer. It's looking more likely that he'll bat 1.000 this year. YAWN!

Walter Littenberg